The hands we hold

Reflection by Sheila Dembowski

Photo by Egor Vikhrev on Unsplash.

How far you go in life depends on your being tender with the young, compassionate with the aged, sympathetic with the striving and tolerant of the weak and strong. Because someday in your life you will have been all of these. — George Washington Carver

Compassion, kindness, love. Each and every day, we have the chance to pass on these blessings. Several months ago, I listened to a local pastor who shared an interesting analogy in a sermon.

Imagine you are standing next to your mother on one side of you and your father on the other side and you are holding their hands. On each side of them are your grandparents, and their parents, on and on, with each added generation also holding hands. Each one of the people in this human “chain” are connected through a combination of genealogy and historical experiences.

For example, when I held my mother’s and father’s hands, I was holding the hands of people who had lived through the Great Depression and World War II.

Within each of our chains, the lineage is different, but they all have love - and the human spirit that creates that love – in common.

What can we learn from these chains of humanity? That we are all connected and with that connection comes an obligation to spread the love beyond our own chain in acts of kindness and compassion.

The saying goes, “You reap what you sow.” But maybe we need to focus more on sowing, so that others can reap. Loving so that others can heal. Being tender, compassionate, sympathetic, and tolerant, knowing that someday we will have need of all of these.

Remembering the hands that we once held. Who, in essence, hold us still.

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Sheila Dembowski
Spreading kindness as often as possible has been a goal of mine for years and I hope that my Kindness Boomerang newsletter does just that. I am an empath, mother, writer, teacher, librarian, and an ambassador of anything related to kindness. In essence, I love books, technology, writing every day, lengthy conversations, hearing my son laugh and spending quiet time every day being thankful.

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What’s Your Story?

I am delighted to share Sheila Dembowski’s thoughtful reflection. Stories about kindness, compassion, and love resonate with me, particularly these days when they seem in short supply. And, as someone fortunate to have close family ties and enjoys spending time researching my ancestors, I am taken by the idea of the chains of humanity and who is holding each of our hands.

I’m also pleased that Sheila’s reflection is the second in response to my Substack’s “Call for Stories.” The first was Patrick Watters’ reflection “Man's heart away from nature becomes hard” and I’ll soon post another one that is waiting in the wings. Generating and sharing these reflections is the purpose of Building Bridges Word by Word Substack and the mission of the project.

Recognizing that we live in challenging and divisive times, Building Bridges Word by Word aims to provide a safe space where we can step back from the rifts that divide us, listen to each other’s stories, and discover that no matter how different we may be, there is much that we have in common - and with that understanding begin to build bridges across our divides.

The project is modeled on three successful poetry anthologies that I co-edited with Sam Intrator, Teaching with Heart, Leading from Within, and Teaching with Fire. In these books, educators and leaders reflect on a favorite poem and its meaning in their work and lives. Readers of these books shared how these stories resonated with their own life experiences, sometimes in surprising ways.

Describing Leading from Within on her blog, No map. No guide. No limits, Lane Wallace wrote, “to unexpectedly stumble onto something that jolts you into seeing the bigger picture again is a gift, wherever you find it… [such as] stumbling onto the quiet wisdom of others who have had to struggle for courage and perspective in adventures and battles of their own.” These insights became the premise of Building Bridges Word by Word.

I hope you will join Patrick, Sheila, and many others by sending in a short reflection (up to 250 words) on a saying, quote, song, or poem is meaningful to you. Check out our Substack to see many of these reflections and the Building Bridges Word by Word website to see the full collection and learn more about the project.

To get started, click on the button below for prompts, guidelines, and next steps. Questions? Contact me at mscribner.buildingbridgeswbw@gmail.com. I look forward to hearing from you and working with you to share your story.

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